Sunday, February 6, 2011


I'd like to share a few thoughts today, as my last post seems to me now as though it is miles away, written by a stranger.

JB was a friend to many; I have known maybe no other person who has had such a positive influence in the lives of so many people.  We had been friends for many years, since our college days, and he was a very big part of my life with CM, from the time we all met.  I am without words to express my gratitude for the loving support that JB and his partner gave me during the past year and a half, during what has been the most lonely and difficult period of my life, while they were in the midst of what would be the last year of their lives together and dealing, daily, with cancer, both as survivor and as caretaker, and as partners.  I would not have gotten along without them.  JB in particular was one of a few people who really acknowledged my existence, emotionally and spiritually, and helped to keep me present in this world, when I began to drift out.  His love, his open arms and open mind, his bright eyes and sweet kisses were a joy to me.  I can only imagine the loss his partner is feeling right now, and it is heartbreaking.

Yes, we carry his bright spirit with us, forward into our lives, but his close presence will be very much missed.

I'm going out now, to take the ski run that I missed last Sunday, and to breathe in the prairie for a while, on this warm and grey day.  Perhaps I will find some words written in the snow.  Peace to you all.


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